Oct 12 2006
Weekends are good. Would you like to know more?
Another work week is almost gone! Work is trying to get really busy again. People on my project have started staying late and working weekends again. So far I have not. I feel bad about it, but lately it has been hard to keep my brain working for 8 hours, with no hope for longer. I don’t know why I care, but I am afraid that they are going to start looking at me as the slacker. I don’t want to be that person, but there is also no point in staying when my brain has left the building. I am pretty much the only person who has not had a day off since this thing started, and that should make me feel better, but it does not. I guess I am going to have to start pulling some longer hours, or at least try to.
Tomorrow I am off to a developers conference. I was looking forward to it, but today they gave us a list of sessions that we have to attend and take notes on so we can come back and tell everyone about them. I suck at telling people about stuff. Ask anyone who knows me they will tell you how bad I am at explaining things.
I packed up my stuff tonight so I don’t have to come back home after the conference is over. Leah and Mandy are so wicked kind to me. They are letting me stay at their house this weekend! Saturday people are coming over and we are all going to carve pumpkins. I was talking about not needing a pattern and now have this expectation that I will do something good. Here’s to hoping I can pull something good out. It is going to be fun even if mine sucks! I am so glad I have all the “roommates” to hang out with. They keep me sane, make me happy, and give me something to look forward to. Thanks guys! In fact I wish I could find the words, or something, to express how much you all have done for me. You all shown me some light in what has to be the darkest time in my life. Just knowing that you all are there if I need someone to talk to is such a help, even if I am to scared to call every time that I would have like to. Please don’t read that anyone is doing anything at all to make me feel this way, because they are not just a problem I have.
I don’t know if it is just me or if most people are like this, but I suck at calling people. I want to, but I never know what to say, or am worried about interrupting something, or being a bother. So many times I would have like to call anyone, but did not because I am scare myself out of it. I think it is more to protect myself from rejection that anything. I am not saying that any one would reject me, but for whatever reason my mind looks for small things that it can twist and make big just to make me feel bad. I don’t understand why, but that seems to be what happens, and I end up parallelized with this unfounded fear that holds me back for a lot of things in my life.
Now for some internet stuff. I have switched from using Bloglines back to Google Reader. I tried Google Reader before I started using Bloglines and it was not that great, but they have make a lot of improvements and it now seems to be the better choice, at least for me. I have also started using Firefox 2 RC 2. It has a spell checker built in, which I really need. That has been one of my problems with WordPress, but no longer since Firefox is checking spelling for me. Good idea Mozilla! Keep up the good work, oh and a grammar checker would be a great next step!